...an invitation to be beautiful

Ellie and I are still at Vanderbilt. Yep...a total of 22 days over the last 5 weeks. BUT, we get to go home tomorrow (I think). Ellie's drain came out on Thursday and mom learned how to give home IVs. We've just been hanging out this weekend allowing her nose to continue healing. After all she's been through, her doc just wanted to make sure nothing flared up over the weekend before releasing us. I can't say that I blame him...this journey has been crazy.

Elliana Xiaowang Mullican...her given Chinese middle name means "to know or to show hope". I do not know if the orphanage named her this, when she was abandoned at 6 months, or if her birth mom named her. But what I do know is that God has written a beautiful story for this little girl. She continues to shine and show HIS hope in situations where most would become angry. 

A couple of stories:
We were in the ER and a doc was trying to reinsert her drain. It was not going well at all...Ellie was hurting and quite frustrated. Ray was talking to her trying to tell her all that was going on and what was coming next. He asked her if she trusted him. Her reply, "No, but I trust Jesus." I love that, she was so honest with her dad. She knew that there was going to be more pain....yet, ultimately she trusted Jesus to see her through all of this.

One of Ellie's nurses was in our room talking to Ellie. Ellie asked Casey if she had any children. "Yes, they are 12, 8, and 6. Boy, girl, boy. And, the girl is a pistol." Ellie asked what that meant. Casey explained to Ellie that her daughter didn't mind very well. Ellie asked, "Does she mind you?" Casey: "Not very often." Ellie: "Does she mind her dad?" Casey: "Not very often." Ellie: "Well, does she at least mind Jesus?" Casey's reply, "I hope she minds Jesus."

After each surgery...lying there in pain coming out of anesthesia, she always thanks the nurses for being "such a good nurse to me."

Her smile is infectious...one can't help but to smile back. Her face so beautiful. Her spirit so peaceful. Many of the nurses see all of this and ask her story. And almost always their reply, "I knew it had to be an amazing story. She is a pretty special little girl."

To know or to show hope.... and she continues to do so in the most unexpected ways at the most unexpected times. To God be the glory!!!

"And this is grace, an invitation to be beautiful...." (Sara Groves)

the surgery that kept on giving...more like taking away

Ellie has always asked to have a second nostril. What parents wouldn't try their hardest to grant this wish for their little girl. So...the journey began last April. Ellie underwent a craniofacial surgery to move her left eye into the correct position and to begin building up the bridge to her nose. The surgery was extremely successful and she recovered very quickly. Within two weeks she was back at school. We were blessed!

The second surgery was on January 4th. The goal was to add more bone to her nose as well as some cartilage to the tip. The bone and cartilage was removed from her rib to form the pyramid portion of her nose with some additional cartilage placed on the end of her nose. The surgery was again very successful. Ellie was out of the hospital in 4 days and back at school a week later. We were so pleased and felt so fortunate that Ellie had not had any complications.

Everything changed two weeks later. One day Ellie woke up with a red spot on the left side of her nose. Within two days time the spot had turned into a large puffy place. On Wednesday January 27th I took her in to see Dr. Kelley. He put Ellie on an oral antibiotic and asked us to call him the following morning to give a report. Unfortunately, the abscess had only gotten worse. Ellie was admitted to Vanderbilt CHildrens that day and underwent surgery to drain the abscess. He also inserted a drain to allow the infection to escape. She was placed on oral IV antibiotics for the weekend with a culture growing to determine the exact nature of the infection. It turned out to be a form of strep that needed a specific antibiotic (not your normal to the doc get antibiotic wait 24 hrs go back to school type). Her meds were changed and the infected site began clearing up. The drain was taken out on Tuesday and Ellie was allowed to go home on Wednesday Feb 2nd. She was to be on two antibiotics (orally) for 28 days. Her nose looked really good with only one small pimple like bump on it, but even it was flesh colored. Ellie was so excited to get back to school...she actually went to school that afternoon.

The following morning (Feb 4th) Ellie once again had a red place on her nose. She and I went on a field trip that day..she had so much fun...and her nose got worse. By the time she got home from school she had a full blown abscess again. I called Dr. Kelley and he asked us to meet him at VCH Emergency. That night one of Dr. Kelley's associates put a drain back in. (this night was so hard...they attempted to insert it with a low dose of meds to help her relax...and it didn't work. She was in a lot of pain and couldn't hold still. They then put in an IV to do IV sedation, Ellie didn't do well with the meds but they were able to get the drain in.) Ellie continued on the IV antibiotics Friday. By Saturday morning her abscess was so bad the Dr. Higdon called Dr. Kelley. They agreed that surgery was needed that day in order to drain the infection. By this point, they were fairly certain that he bone and plate that been put in Jan. 4th had been compromised. Indeed the infection was spreading. They removed the plate and bone, cleaned out the area, and left in a drain in order for any more infection to have a place to escape. At this point the Infectious Disease docs are saying 30 days of antibiotics and plastics is saying at least 10 more days here. I'll update later to tell how it ends....

Wow...it has been a long month! 5 days in the hospital, out for 20, 7 days in the hospital, out for 1, and now 4 days and counting in the hospital. Ellie has been amazing in all of this. She hates surgery...she is really afraid of not waking up. Outside of surgery...she is a model patient. She tolerates all of this so well...all while continuing to warm all hearts around her with that gorgeous, God-given smile. I do not know why she has had to endure all of this. But, even in this, God continues to use her as a conduit. Every nurse and doc love working with her..she always smiles...and many ask questions wanting to know her story. YES, God has a story already written. I feel quite sure it is amazing...what I have witnessed has been amazing. His is the divine author!

Her first summer in America...

Finishing 3rd grade strong. Her first summer as a typical american school child. The beach with the family for 10 days. Best friend from the orphange (Kloi) spent several days with Ellie. Missing her "Alex" as Alex is taking flight in life and not home as much, for days at the time. Learning to swim, even in the deep end then jumping off diving boards. Cousin Camp. Baptism, Ellie loves her Heavenly Father. The start of a new school year... a big 4th grader. Oh and did I say that she has done all of this with that huge smile on her face?! Not least you think she is perfect... we do experience a strong will that equals the passion when she has that huge smile on her face... the strong will just doesn't show up as often as the smile. One passionate little girl.... what does God have in store for her?
the kids all had a great time at the beach. Ray has had to work a lot this summer, more than Ellie is used to. Ellie has been asking when we could go back to the beach. "Daddy we are a family at the beach, we are all together and you don't have to work." I like the family time at the beach too!


Ellie had a lot of pool time this summer....and loved every minute of it!

We had "cousin camp" at the farm in July. About 20 kids ranging from 6- 18 (all of Ellie's cousins on my dad's side of the family), along with their parents and some of the grandparents. Fun to be had by all. We do crazy things like race to see who can eat a doughnut off of a string that has been tied to a clothes line. Ellie decided that wasn't for her, but Keeli went after that doughnut with gusto. And yes... the adults participate in these crazy activites too. We also do some crafts, swim, play games, eat (a lot) and have a grand time!






On August 9th Ellie was baptized. She was prayed for in the service and then dunked in the Harpeth River. I am truly amazed at her understanding of the love her Heavenly Father has for her. But then again, God is the author of her story.

You can see that this little girl, once an orphan, and now not only part of a family, but part of God's family has had a full and happy summer. School has started and she has yet again already made a ton of friends. And now.... her story continues. May she always embrace the story that God is writing.


She has so much love and life to give... may she always take the opportunity to bless others with what God has given her.

belated Mother's Day thoughts

On this day...I am a bit sad. A good friends little one would be celebrating her birthday. Are there birthdays in heaven? I mean....do we actually change our age from year to year as we do on earth? I know that in heaven it really doesn't matter, for every day will be celebrated in grand and glorious ways, every person will be celebrated in grand and glorious ways. But it does beg the question... is Erin 8 or is she 20? For now, I choose to ponder and be satisfied in the not knowing... for one day He will be revealed, one day I will understand, one day.

Our Ellie girl is still amazing us all. How can this little one who spent almost nine years of her life in an orphanage just one day accept that she now has a family? Oh the ways our Father has prepared her heart. Should we not be surprised that He is authoring all of this? Oh on the contrary... we know He is the author of all things, it is the taking for granted that we should lay down and the awe and mystery that we should pick up and embrace. It is the healing of our own hearts that happens when we choose to see Him that we are to embrace. Oh the mystery... He gives and takes away. It was Erin's life and death that rocked my world. The first born, the feelings that come with being a mom, the undeniable love for a child.... such a mysterious concept, and then after only 9 short years... gone. But He gives life again... three more times. Each and every time more healing has occurred, not only in this mom, but also in Alex and in Ray. Our Father has a plan. We can push, pull, prod, jump, shout, refuse.... but He is the author of our lives. He knows what we need.... He knows what we will give... He knows how the story unfolds. So with that I say Thank You Father for being chosen to suffer. For it is only in our suffering and the hope of heaven that we really see you... that we truly embrace all that is lovely.

I love being a mom! I fail miserably at it sometimes... but I pray that somehow my kids know how much they are loved... and that I would do just about anything for them. I can't fathom a better job...

Easter 2009...Ellie prayed to receive Christ

I continue to be amazed by this little one that Our Heavenly Father placed in our family. Ellie had surgery on Tuesday April 9th. The doctor not only repositioned her left eye, but also was able to harvest bone from her skull and begin the reconstruction on her nose as well. Her body has responded so well...she was able to come home after just 3 nights in the hospital. She cannot be bumped in the head or face for several months and infection is also an issue...so we are home with her for a while. Once she can go out, she has to be very careful...so no PE or recess at school. We have even had to tell our other kids no horsing around at home...flailing arms may accidentally hit Ellie. For now, she is fine to just watch the others play.

This morning Ellie and I stayed home while Ray took the others to our Easter Sunrise Service. Ellie and I watched the last hour of The Jesus Film. Ellie was so enthralled by the movie. She didn't understand why anyone would want to kill Jesus. At the end of the movie an explanation of the movie is given and there is an invitation to receive Christ. Ellie prayed....and received Christ. I know there is a lot that she doesn't understand...but then again, there is a lot that I do not understand. Thank you Father for your love for Ellie!

Hope...what an amazing word. Elliana...Hebrew for-the lord has spoken. Xiaowang...Chinese for- to know or to show hope. God has given us an amazing little girl who knows hope in ways that most do not ever understand. The hope that she knows radiates from her all the time. Thank you Father for choosing our family for Ellie. Thank you Father for choosing Ellie to be your daughter.

A little over 11 years ago Erin went home to Jesus. She knew him...she knew she was His daughter. Today Alex, David, Keeli and Ellie know Him too. I mourn for the loss of Erin...but not without hope. For one day I will see Jesus face, I will know Him in ways that now I can only imagine. One day I will see Erin again. One day David, Ellie and Keeli will get to meet their sister and Alex will once again see her best friend. But until tlhat day....I know my Savior lives...He lives for each of us...He has called all of my family to be his own...our hope lies in Him and Him alone. Praise be to God....blessed by His name!

Ellie's Home....days early

Ellie is such an awesome patient...she is now home!!! What a surprise! To God be the glory. Her recovery has obviously gone really well. She will now be home (literally) until we see Dr. Kelly again on April 20th. Infection is a big issue as well as not getting bumped in the head or on the face. So...please pray for her to be able to stay calm (she is normally very active), for her not to get sick, and the incision site to remain healthy. Many blessings to all who have prayed for her. May you all have a glorious weekend celebrating our Saviour's resurrection.

yeah Ellie....surgery went well

Ellie's surgery went really well. She spent a couple of days in PICU and just moved to a regular room this morning. She will probably be here at Vanderbilt until Monday.
Thanks for all your prayers.